If I were to live in Australia, I would live in Noosa Head. The most gorgeous little town on the Sunshine Coast. It's like Yorkville, but in the tropics.

I survived Fraser Island, the largest sand island in the world. Interestingly enough, I only camped one night out of two. The night I camped out was ridiculously painful. I didn't even take out my contacts for fear of sand getting into them. The second night we were lucky enough to meet these older men partying in a large 30 room cabin at Indian head (where you see sharks, dolphins and turtles) and they invited the whole group of 22 people to stay and party with them. How could we refuse? So we got a shower and a bed out of that...now THAT'S my kind of camping. The most beautiful freshwater lake on the island was Lake Mackenzie. Best time ever...especially with all the people we met. Swedes, Norwegians, Germans, Americans. It's exciting to see how everyone is going to the same places, up and down the coast.

Whitsundays was nice, but it wasn't as good because the weather was on and off rainy. Besides, put on a boat with bad weather doesn't make for a fun time either.

Cannot wait for New Zealand!!

"I'm holding on your rope,
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothin new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late"

- one republic, apologize

it's raining, thundering, POURING outside.

and i love it.

i love that i'm sitting inside, in the dark, but with the balcony sliding door open, which is letting the bright white cloudy light and cool breeze in. what a refreshing feeling this is. weird, i was sleeping in late today, and now i feel i'm able to do some assignments that need to get done.

the last post was kind of crazy and i realize that. it was a result of a lot of pent up anxiety and emotions relating to life, love, friends and family...but mostly the future that is to come.

but this rain is totally welcome and relaxing. the sound of pouring rain, and the lightening and thunder that comes with it...is great! and the smell of clean and fresh air....actually, it's been raining on and off the past couple of days. but for some reason, this is the one that's done it.

Considering I'm in the city of Sydney, with a population of almost 4.5 million people, you wouldn't think I'd feel so lonely.

It's a Friday night, and there's a pool party that going to start in about half an hour. Yet, I have no desire to go. I feel wholly out of shape and unmotivated. With just about two weeks left of Uni, I seem to have run out of steam. I've decided that I detest the whole idea of attending Uni and travelling at the same time. It sucks. A LOT.

Everything fun that is happening is hampered by course assignments. And to top it off, because I'm not working, it's just money flying out the window. It's really REALLY depressing.

Travelling is supposed to be fun, and when I am, it IS fun. So the answer is NO to UNI.

Unfortunately, I have no answer for this pressing desire to be anti-social. I'd much rather stay at home, sit on my balcony and stare into the beautiful skyline of a city that DOES go to sleep after 11pm.

I wonder about ever working in Sydney. It's a possiblity, but never living with people I don't know. I like my roomies, but I've noticed that I can be very particular about certain things, things that I've always just assumed were my mother's peculiarities....until I've lived on my own. I also wonder about working in general. This unknown about going back home to no job and living at home...well, it's depressing. But I have no other choice but to do so because guess what? Running out of money isn't much help either.

So yes, this is a pretty bad post considering it's been awhile since I've last posted. But at the same time, I don't seem to have anyone else to talk about this to at the moment, so cybercity, this one's for you.

I don't know what i've done
Or if i like what i've begun
But something told me to run
And honey you know me it's all or none
There were sounds in my head
Little voices whispering
That i should go and this should end
Oh and i found my self listening

See i thought love was black and white
That it was wrong or it was right
But you aren't leaving without a fight
And i think i am just as torn inside

And I wont be far from where you are if ever you should call
You meant more to me then any one i've ever loved at all
But you taught me how to trust myself
And so i say to you, this is what i have to do.

Cause i don't know who i am, who i am without you
All i know is that i should
And i don't know if i could stand another hand upon you
All i know is that i should
Cause she will love you more then i could
She who dares to stand where i stood

Missy Higgins - Where I Stood

Sometimes I find it difficult to post a blog when so much time has passed by. There's always a ton of stuff that happens inbetween that time period. And then I don't know where to start from. For example, yesterday I went to the Sydney fishmarket with my flatmates (asti and vivian.) We were so excited to go because we were going to get relatively inexpensive and fresh fish to eat on our new dinner table! That's right, you read it properly: We got our couches and dinner table at midnight the night before.

We came home with some white fish (hahaha) and salmon. yummy! Vivian and Asti cooked the white fish later in the evening. I would have helped but I maintain my philosophy that "too many cooks spoil the broth." I made myself useful as the photographer!

After gorging ourselves with food (according to my auntie, i'm starving) I took a NAP and then later on went out to "pontoon", a sydney restaurant and nightclub by cockle bay wharf. After returning home at an indecent hour, I am now up because I need to go for a run.

Why? Because I've signed up for the City 2 Surf run that is happening on August 12, 2007. My cousin thinks I am going to kill myself as it is a 14km run that involves many hills. I disagree. Jay and I signed up and it will be a fun run for us. Taking it easy, enjoying the scenery, and once I get to Bondi beach, hit up Amy's new digs! It's so great that I know someone who lives out by the beaches! whoo hoo!

Let's not forget to mention that I was in Canberra last weekend. I went to celebrate Bronwyn's birthday. She picked me up from the Jolimont station and then we went to a computer party (deja vu from the computer science student association times from u of t, hahaha) where they were serving free drinks. Then, I was invited out to dinner with the Sheppard family where I became a surrogate child. hahaha. I tagged along for a round at the casino, and then we went out dancing at the Uni pub.

Before I continue, I would like to take this moment to discuss some words I have learned.
It's your shout = It's your turn to buy this round
hire = rent (Eg. hire a movie)

I'll continue to update the list because it IS 7:30am and I can't think of the other words I've learned at this moment in time.

Johanna, a girl I met while I was in Fiji, is in from Melbourne this weekend. So I'm going up to the blue mountains with her today. And judging by the sunshine outside, it looks like a good day to do it too! Once I get back, I'll publish a post on school...because I started this week!

FIJI TIME & SETTLING IN SYDNEY

The Yasawa Islands adventure was the best adventure of my life. Mesj, Kris and I went with Awesome Adventures Fiji, and went with the package, A Great Pair. We stopped off at two islands, Kuata and Korovou. Both were beautiful and different in their own ways. On Kuata, we had much more traditional Fijian foods and went snorkling and hiking up to the summit of the island. This is also the same island that they shot the portion where Tom Hanks tried to hang himself in "Castaway" after he lost his ball, Wilson.

Where Kuata was more traditional and intimate, Korovou was a resort aimed at tourists. The food was more international, they had singing and dancing by the "bula boys", and they had a lot more of the comforts that we would be used to at home, such as the internet. Here, I did more hiking, including a sunrise hike that was quite challenging as before the sun came up, we had to hike up by flashlight. The guy I went with, Bjoern, was really scared of spiders, which turned out to be a blessing in disguise as he would hike infront and point out all the spider webs so I wouldn't walk into them. I did alot more activity on this island including swimming in the dark, sleeping on the beach in order to enjoy the beauty of solar system in the southern hemisphere, and going to visit the village on the island. At the village, the primary school children sang songs, recited poetry and performed dances for us tourists. It was really interesting to see that even though the Fijians have their own language, they are still taught English in their schools. Their school rooms looked very similar to classrooms that you'd see in North America.

Now, I have been in Sydney for almost a week. I spent the first four days and three nights at the Maze Backpackers Hostel near Chinatown. Together with the other three girls, we attended orientation at the Paramatta Campus on the second day. It turned out to be quite useless as all the information that we were given, we had already known from before.

The next couple of days spent looking for accommodations in the city. Let me tell you how different it is looking for places then in Toronto. Before I got here, I had visions in my head about finding a nice little flat for the four of us, and we would each get our own bedroom. RIIIIIGHT. The horrible reality is that most of the apartments in Sydney are crowded with people. I was really lucky to find a place in Ultimo that I am now sharing with two other girls. The other three have found a place very nearby that they share with three other boys. So they have six people in their two bedroom apartment versus my three people n a two bedroom apartment. Also, because people are packed into small spaces, the living quarters are disgusting. Alot of the places that I went to look at were very cluttered and messy. So, I really count myself lucky to finding a place where I have my own space.

I also have free wireless internet, and the place comes with a gym and pool. It's also a 10 min walk to the central train station where I will need to go when I have to go to school. AND, I am a two minute walk from the Broadway shopping centre where they cater to just about ALL my needs. There's several grocery stores there, a pharmacy (which they call chemist in oz), phone place, travel place, tons of clothing stores, food court....EVERYTHING.

Because of all this settling in, I haven't really taken in any of Sydney's sights yet. Also, I have spent a night at my Aunt and Uncle's house in Hornsby. They are a really sweet couple and have offered to help me with anything that I need. I met my cousin, Lanthia, her husband, Tom, and their three children, Crystal, Aaron, and Kara, for the first time. They made us dumplings! yummy!

Tomorrow, I plan to visit the Chinese garden and the Sydney Aquarium. This weekend will also be really fun as I am going to visit my friend Bronwyn in Canberra. It is her birthday on friday so I'm catching the bus and staying two nights with her and PARTYING IT UP!!!!

FIJIAN ADVENTURE: DAY 1 & 2

I'm currently sitting at an internet cafe at the Nadi Bay Hotel, a gorgeous place with two pools and good food!

The flight was very long. Jo, Kristen and I flew out of Pearson airport and stopped over in Minneapolis and LA before flying to Nadi airport, Fiji. The first flight was on a tiny plane and even though it was a two hour flight, it felt MUCH LONGER. The next two were consecutively larger and after taking a gravol on the last 11hr leg from LA to Nadi, I was feeling really sprightly. We almost missed our last flight there because they had our flight under two airlines. We arrived at 5:30am at the airport and immediately encountered a very LARGE problem...our luggage did not arrive with us from LA!!! :0

Yup, that's right. You can imagine our horror when we found out that there was no more luggage from that flight. We talked to the luggage people at the desk and they told us that they would be put on the next flight the very next day. But after arriving at the hotel, we got very worried because we were hearing all these horror stories from other backpackers staying at the hotel. They were saying things like not receiving their luggage for days, and one girl staying here STILL hasn't received her luggage in the past FOUR days!!! Plus Fijians like to rip us off with money. They put us in a taxi and charged us $10 when really it's like a $4 ride.

Anyway, we were definitely NOT happy campers. We went into Nadi downtown area and tried to look for swim suits but they were either incredibly expensive or they were so cheap and gross, and frankly, didn't cover much. Either way we ended up going to the airport really early this morning, and THANK GOODNESS, our luggage were all there. I think they just got confused at the LA airport. It's very disorganized there.

So now we've just spent the day lounging by the pool in our OWN bikinis and drinking strawberry milkshakes and Fijian beer. There are a lot of English people here. We seem to be the only Canadians so far. We head out to the Yasawa Islands in the morning and will be there for 4 days.

I finally went to Shoppers yesterday and spoke with the pharmacist about an over the counter cough medicine for my chronic cough. He said it sounded like I had a mild lung infection... :0 Well, no use but to drink up now. I dislike cough syrup because it leaves such a bitter aftertaste. One more week left of touring, and then I will be able to really relax and get better.

Last week's five day tour to Quebec City was awesome. There was so much free time for shopping that my addiction has once again flared. I bought all these new tops and hoodies from Simons, and shoes from Aldo, AND a new bikini from Garage!!! I keep justifying these purchases by telling myself that I'm buying them for Australia. hahahaha.

A bunch of tour managers went out thursday night and we partied it up at the Dag until 3am!!!! The first floor had performances by these guys who looked like they were part of KISS, and they rocked out 80s tunes. We stayed downstairs for a good couple of hours, and then went upstairs where they played normal club beats. I have to say that it was one of the best times in terms of clubbing in a looong time. There were people there but not so many that it was crowded. The music was fantastic, and there was a nice mix of guys and girls in our group.

I have to say touring is one of the best things I did for myself. Ryan and Christine showed me the back way of the Dufferin terrace on tuesday. It's the largest terrace in North America! Such gorgeous views of the St. Lawrence river. Every week I see new things, discover new places, meet new people. The children are a blast to work with. Sure, there are random annoyances, but it's all part of the job.

This weekend was the first weekend off in forever. Cat took me to the Holt Renfrew spa on bloor street where she treated me to a hot stone massage!!! I had my massage first, then we went to Pusateri's and had cafe au laits while sitting on the patio in the nice hot sun. Then I went shopping (see a pattern here?) while she went for her massage. After a nice looooong afternoon nap, I went out in the evening with Shelley.

For Father's day, Ames and I bought him a watch because it broke after/during Ames' LSAT test. I have discovered that I do not like looking at watches. They bore me. hahaha. Ames has even sold me her laptop, so now I have one more thing ready for Oz!

Three weeks before I leave! But it doesn't feel like it. I will probably feel it once work is done...if it is EVER done!

I love visiting the National Gallery. Every single time I walk into that building, the guide shows the group something different, something new. This week, my favorite painting was A.Y. Jackson's "The Red Maple."



Another favorite place to visit is Byward Market. I suggested the french bakery to the kids, and then spent a lunch hour with some of the boys. We even tried out some teas at the tea shop across St. George st. The shop staff were so nice. I told them about my constant cough that doesn't seem to want go away, and they put together a nice concoction of herbs for me to try.

We even went to an Ottawa Lynx vs. Durham Bulls game at the Jetform Park. We had a picnic dinner of burgers and hot dogs and then 3 hrs of sitting in a very windy stadium. I didn't hold out for very long, and after about half an hour, retreated into the stadium restaurant and watched the rest of the game from the box area.

Before I forget, I wanted to write a little paragraph on this amazing sandwich restaurant that Manny took me to on monday for lunch. It's call "Sandwich Box". They make all their bread fresh daily, and is healthy and pricey (about $6.85.) hahaha. Each sandwich comes with a side salad, and you can pick any three options to put in the sandwich, including the type of bread and spread.

Tuesday evening, met up with some of the CCMers at the Beer Bistro for a quick bite and greet before meeting up with Michelle to see "Brand against the Brain" showing at the Elgin Theatre. Part of the Luminato festival, it is a cute black and white movie by director, Guy Maddin. It used a live TSO orchestra, narrator, singer, and other people to make the sounds that a normal movie would have. Without those distractions, I probably would have gotten pretty motion sick as it was what I would call "contemporary."

With the gorgeous weather from today, I will be rollerblading at harborfront this evening.

These prints speak for themselves. Drawn by Canadian Native Artists, Cecil Youngfox, Benjamin Chee Chee and Doris Cyrette. I bought a packet of 7 cards by Doris at the Canadian Museum of Civilization and I plan on framing them in my room. :)


- "Returning" by Cecil Youngfox


- "Snow Singers" by Cecil Youngfox


- "Good Morning" by Benjamin Chee Chee


- "Spring Flight" by Benjamin Chee Chee


- "Swallows" by Benjamin Chee Chee


- "Learning" by Benjamin Chee Chee


- "Autumn Flight" by Benjamin Chee Chee


- "Friends" by Benjamin Chee Chee


- "Night Spirits" by Doris Cyrette


- "First Born" by Doris Cyrette

- "Interlude" by Doris Cyrette

Alright, how do I start this thing?

I am currently sitting at work, staring out of one of their huge "floor to ceiling" windows and struggling not to fall asleep. I just came back from an Ottawa tour this week, and it was by far the most tiring trip. My cough has been off and on about getting better, but by trying to project my voice out to a crowd of teens just takes its toll on my throat. It's now so completely hoarse that I don't even know how anyone can understand what I'm saying.

The Ottawa trip itself was a lot of fun. We visited the usual attractions, but new things to see included attending the "Question period" at the House of Commons as well as visiting the Diefenbunker. Question period was super cool because I was able to see all the MP's together, and it was almost a full house. Jack Layton, Stephen Harper, Giles Duceppe, Stephane Dion, Olivia Chow, Ken Dryden....they were ALL there. And they all sounded like little children bickering over a toy. So much fun!

But the children were exhausting. Sometimes I look at them and realize how TV dramas come up with so much fodder for their shows. It's THEM. I am sooooo glad that I wasn't like that when I was little...or wasn't given the opportunity to be like that. hahaha.

Ames came back from Europe yesterday too. We all met up at Yorkdale and had dinner at Moxies. Then we went home to unpack and unwind. Unfortunately, I had to force myself NOT to sleep because Shelley was having a little girl's out gathering for her birthday and I knew if I went to sleep, I wouldn't have been able to wake myself up.

Driving to Demetres was very difficult so I ended up going there, and then leaving as soon as she came. At least I made an appearance!

It has been suggested that I take some bedrest. And I will, but it will probably be Monday and Tuesday. It's always hard to not fill up my time with friends and family. But it's about time I just stay a day in bed!

It's been a long and crazy week. The long weekend was exactly that: LONG. haha.

I spent half of it working and then Sunday afternoon I went to Ottawa with my parents because mom wanted to see the end of the Tulip Festival. We stayed in the luxurious Chateau Laurier and spent some time at Byward market. In the evening, we had a super delicious fresh seafood basket at The Fishmarket Restaurant. The market also has the best french bakery called "Le Moulin de Provence." It sells classic french pastries and croissants with steaming bowls of cafe au laits. Hmmmm hmm, yum!

The tulips were almost done but we were lucky to still see some of them. I took my parents up to Parliament hill where there was much Victoria Day activities going. Then on our way back to check out of the hotel, we were lucky enough to catch a boat going through the eight locks on the rideau canal. Watching the little boat move from lock to lock was fascinating (but it took a very long time!)

My mom also has a thing for the Royal Canadian Mint, so we stopped off to look at some pretty, shiny, and EXPENSIVE coins.

The rest of the week was spent in my favorite city: Montreal. It was a little hectic because the Metro workers had just gone on a walk-out the day we arrived. So traffic was "fun." :S This particular trip was interesting because the students went to all these places I had never visited before: the biodome, insectarium, botanical gardens, iSci (Science Centre), Pointe-a-Calliere (Montreal Museum of Archeology), and the Montreal Holocaust Memorial Centre. My favorite was the biodome. It is a self-guided tour of four different types of ecosystems: the laurentian forest, tropical forest, saint-lawrence marine and arctic and antarctic ecosystem. Pointe-a-Calliere was also really cool too because I liked studying archeology in university and they showed the original wall of Montreal before it was torn down. The iSci museum is currently hosting "le monde du corps 2 (body world 2)" which I was disappointed about missing when it was in Toronto. Unfortunately, the students did not go to see that exhibit. Althought, the Technocite, Eureka, and Snowbirds exhibit were still fun.

The holocaust museum was a very interesting choice for the students as it had a really sombering effect. However, the head teacher was most interested in this memorial centre and overall it was so interesting and eye-opening. You only hear about the holocaust, but never really knew the nitty-gritty details. Still, not the funnest thing to do on the last day of the trip.

So this weekend is filled with various activities. But all I really want to do is veg out and relax. yeeeeah!

Thanks to Sammy Champs, who founded New France in 1608, we now have Quebec City. Even better, thanks to Lord Dufferin, who stopped the walls (enceinte) from being destroyed, Old Quebec City is a World Heritage Site because it is the only walled city left in Canada.

I love Old Quebec City. It rivals Paris as being the most romantic place in the world.

Back from my first tour to Ottawa! And it was a success! In the end, it felt like being on any tour, except, instead of being a visitor going to a place for the first time, I was the guide who had prior knowledge of the surrounding buildings and areas. I must admit that it was quite daunting at first. In training, we are given a plethora of information. Of course, alot of it is background information that we need to know in case students ask questions. From this, we have to judge what is interesting enough to the kids.

As we all know and remember, grade 8 grad trips weren't REALLY about learning...it was more the experience of being away from home for a couple of days in a different city. So the task at hand is to find a way to stuff information and facts without boring them to death.

It is a lot different once we are older. We understand things alot more, and are more willing to learn. Since it was my first time as a guide, I went to all the guided tours at the various places we visited.

We went to Rideau Hall to visit the Governor General's residence. Her excellency Michaëlle Jean, has implemented a website that allows Canadian citizens to voice their issues and concerns in forums.

We also visited the Supreme Court, where the students participated in a mock trial. There was a federal court in session, so there were a couple of cameras and reporters standing on the side. This excited the students as they thought there was a celebrity in the midst!

The Parliamentary building tour was a little disappointing as both the House of Commons and the Senate were sitting. We did stop by the newly re-decorated parliamentary library before going up to the Peace Tower.

However, my FAVORITE places that we visited were the National Gallery and Canadian War Museum. The tour for the gallery was quite an eye-opening experience as the guide explained some important paintings such as The Death of General Wolfe by Benjamin West and Barnett Newman's Voice of Fire. The war museum is a fascinating place with an abundance of Canadian military history. As we were on our tour, we had a war veteran come up and explain the difference between artillery and guns. I also recognized two large bronze plaques with all the names of Eaton employees who died in WWI and WWII that were donated by the Eaton family. When I was younger, it used to be displayed on the 5th floor of the Eatons department store downtown.

Let's not forget the children. This group of kids were incredible. I have a feeling that it can only go downhill from here! Sure, there were some sticky spots involving several episodes of vomiting (which I am thankful to say that I did not particpate in) from the aggressive driving of our crazy bus driver, but overall, they were a really good bunch. Chatting with them reminded me how naive I was when I was little. It was quite refreshing to see it from an "older" perspective.

Next week: Quebec City

I went to see the Japanese Design Today exhibit yesterday with Christian and Michelle. First of all, I haven't seen this pair since Michelle's birthday. Second of all, they have recently come back from a trip to HK and China, where Chris had the worst hospital experience in his life. Note to self, don't get sick when in foreign countries.

Although the exhibit itself was interesting and modern, I was hardly impressed with any of it. Why? Because they ran out of pamphlets explaining the recent trends and characteristics of Japanese design. It wouldn't have been so bad except that none of the exhibits had any place cards to explain any of the objects. All they had were numbers (for reference to a pamphlet.) I went back to the front desk to inquire what other options there were, but the customer representative got defensive and snarky. The result? I went to see an exhibit that probably was very good, but got none of that because they ran out of pamphlets. I wasn't trying to cause any problems, but the exhibit continues until the end of the weekend, and I'm pretty sure I won't be the only patron who would want an explanation for what they are seeing. The least they could do is give a disclaimer as people are purchasing their tickets.

Either way, at least I got to see my buddies. We had a great lunch at Richtree (Marche) and they went over the nitty gritty details of their asian experience. Michelle is also showing some new photography at the Eastern Gallery starting May 2nd, 2007. It is part of the CONTACT Toronto Photography Festival that is running from May 1 - 31, 2007.

Anyone who hasn't seen Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth, should see it. It is a very powerful documentary on the realities of global warming and the devastating effects that has already begun in our lifetime. The sad truth of the matter is that not enough people know of this problem. The documentary highlights the fact that the governments seem to be trying to displace the truth of the problem.

Not long ago, I was researching global warming for a feature. I had to put it aside because there was just too much to go through in such a short amount of time (I was obviously doing this last minute.) It is a very interesting topic, but seems to be overshadowed by skeptics and critics who believe this is just a small blip, and that nature is playing tricks with us. Just watch this documentary. This is what our world is coming to. It's scary and eye-opening.

Anyone who knows me well enough, knows that I love going to the symphony. It is just another quirk of mine, and is easily fulfilled by the the fanatabulous TSO. Our Toronto concertmaster, Peter Oundjian, is incredible. Such a distinguished older looking man. Combined with his adorable accent, he is part of the reason why I enjoy the works the TSO puts together. With the help of cheap tickets and a fun concert calendar full of fun (such as the magic music of disney, mozart, beethovan, lemony snicket, other canadian symphonies), it has become more than just a night out on town. It has become part of MY definition of who I am. For just $12 (about the same as going out to a movie), I can go with another friend and enjoy any kind of music. Over the past three years, I have had the pleasure of going with other friends who enjoy this culture, as well as introduce friends to it.

This past week, the Toronto, Ottawa, Quebec and Montreal symphonies did an exchange. They all went on tour together, and travelled to other cities to perform for different audiences. Thanks to all these concertmasters, I was able to get a taste of some other Canadian symphonies! Although they were all wonderful, I must admit that I fell in love with the Montreal symphony, and their concertmaster, Kent Nagano. What lustrious pantene pro-v hair the man has! And he interpreted the music so well. When he and the orchestra were playing Rossini's William Tell Overture, I found myself bopping along! And the symphony's version of Beethovan's Symphony No. 7, especially the 2nd movement, it sent shivers up my spine! This is just another reason why I should live in Montreal...beautiful music!

I plan on sampling the Australian symphony as well. Music will always stand the test of time!

After months of neglecting some homies, I have returned with a vengence!

Yesterday was an excellent display of my efforts. Met up with my cheery cousin for spring rolls at Salad King. When we walked in, the smell of the food made us sooooo hungry! Luckily we were smart, and just had the spring rolls which filled me up. I cannot wait to meet Cam for her birthday! :)

I digested by walking through Eaton center. I must say that the mall disappoints me. There is nothing that I've seen that made me really excited to buy anything. Maybe I should just save up to spend when I am in Oz. Carl called while I was wandering around and we met up for coffee at the BCE place. I haven't seen my brother since January! Always the same, but I love meeting up with him to chat about things in life. Always puts everything into perspective for me, and makes me happy!

The great thing about the location was that he works in the building with Marche (since named, richtree) which was where I was meeting Fayewood for dinner. Highschool buddies rock! It was so good to catch-up on our lives. We have decided that we're going to the beach for the Canada long weekend. Yay to warm weather. That was the best part of the day, the sun came out! So walking outside in a skirt was much easier. hahaha. Walking to....the princess of wales for Phantom of the Opera!

I swear, I never get tired of musicals. I can watch them over and over and over again. And this production was no exception. Although the guy who played Raoul was an awful singer, the Phantom, and Christine were amazing. The pyrotechnics were nice, but I can't say I was a fan. Too many popping and heart-stopping moments. hahaha. Either way, Faye's a darling for taking me to the show. What a great early birthday present!

Speaking of birthdays, tomorrow is a special day for Jordan and Tanaka!!!! Happy birthday!

Eight months later, I have grown so much in such a short amount of time. I have met an incredible group of people who I will cherish for a very long time. It's a little scary to think about how much we have gone through and bonded. We know a lot about one another (in some instances, a little too much) but whether it is for the worst or the best, we were there.


This experience has been so much more self-satisfying than all of the four years of university that I went through. Don't get me wrong, I still love and stay in touch with my university friends, but back then, I was unsure of where I was going in life, and things were more chaotic and disorderly. I hadn't fully learnt the value of time management and was much too excited with an unfamiliar feeling of independence. The friends that I made were more valuable in teaching me who I was and what I wanted.


I would like to visit you for a while
Get away and out of this city
Maybe I shouldn't have called but someone had to be the first to break
We can go sit on your back porch
Relax
Talk about anything
It don't matterI'll be courageous if you can pretend that you've forgiven me

Because I don't know you anymore
I don't recognize this place
The picture frames have changed and so has your name
We don't talk much anymore
We keep running from the pain
But what I wouldn't give to see your face again

Springtime in the city
Always such relief from the winter freeze
The snow was more lonely than cold
If you know what I mean
Everyone's got an agenda, don't stop
Keep that chin up, you'll be all right
Can you believe what a year it's been
Are you still the same?
Has your opinion changed?

'Cause I don't know you anymore
I don't recognize this place
The picture frames have changed and so has your name
We don't talk much anymore
We keep running from these sentences
But what I wouldn't give to see your face again

I know I let you down
Again and again
I know I never really treated you right
I've paid the priceI'm still paying for it every day
So maybe I shouldn't have called
Was it too soon to tell?
Oh what the hell
It doesn't really matter
How do you redefine something that never really had a name?
Has your opinion changed?

Because I don't know you anymore
I don't recognize this place
The picture frames have changed and so has your name
We don't talk much anymore
We keep running from the pain
But what I wouldn't give to see your face again

I see your face
I see your face

- I don't know you anymore, Savage Garden

This program was different because these people share the same passion for what I want to do in life. The field is so small, and I know in my heart that I will see the people who I care for again in the future. I know a lot of people in this program are sad to see things change. Don't be sad, embrace change. It is very important in our own development through life. Without change, life would be mundane and boring. This song is one of my favorites because it is so pretty and sad. At the same time, it gives a feeling of hope for the future.

The most important thing to remember is: take destiny into your own hands. Don't sit around to wait for things to happen. Do it for yourself. This is life. It's short, so make the most of it.

So I was called to work Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Naturally, I accepted. However, this has taken a whole chunk of my weekend to do homework. The weekend that I really needed because my seminar is this thursday, and the trip to Kingston/Ottawa is this friday.

On the bright side, there was a flood at the new Roehampton building friday evening so the past two days have been quite slow. Which has lent me pleeenty of time to work on school work. So really, it has all worked out quite nicely. Still, I'm slightly nervous about the week to come. I cannot wait until it is over.

The weather is making me depressed. The motivation is dragging on the ground, and school has suddenly has suddenly become a huge weight to carry. There's literally ONE MORE MONTH left before it's allllllllll over...but I feel like everything has just gone into slow motion.

ARGH!!! It's already daylight savings time!!!! Of all days to go out to a club (with Matt and Shelley, no less), it had to be yesterday, when we were losing an hour of sleep!

Honestly, it gets tiresome going out all the time. And march has been ABSOLUTELY no exception. How many birthdays have I celebrated or gone to already? Alot of them I would never have even known about if not for facebook!

Yesterday was Mich's birthday dinner at Fred's Not Here. Matt, Tony, Sange and I arrived fashionably late, but luckily so did everyone else. I love Mich's dinners and friends. It's so laid back and fun. No one is really awkward, and as usual, I like to zoom in on the quietest people at the table. hahaha. So the joint present the four of us pitched in for b-day girl? Some wii game. I have no idea what it is. but hey, if she's excited about it, then I'm allllllllll for it! ;p

The club part was disappointing. My bestest friend in the whole wide world was invited to a b-day party (surprise surprise!!) So considering she rarely goes out, let alone goes to clubs anymore, Matty and I join in as sidekicks (but I know the b-day boy too.) We went to C-Lounge which apparently is the club to go. Beautiful decor but awful choice in music. All of it was dance remixes! We stayed until almost 2am in the vain hopes that the DJ would play something good. The characters at the club were not very attractive either. And then, 2am comes around and suddenly it's 3am.

AND, I still have so much homework to do. But that's not stopping me from going skiing today. Suffer the consequences tomorrow.

So the moral of this story? Go to good clubs to have a good dancing night. Otherwise, start up your own dance party in the car.

so second term is moving along quite nicely. It seems that a lot of the work this term is done independently, or if it is team work, it is one whole entire project instead of a lot of little ones. i don't generally think about this, but someone asked me the other day, if i wonder about who i will keep in touch with after the program is finished. well, i don't really need to wonder about this because i have a pretty good idea who those people are. What I don't understand is why everyone cares about that. If you want to stay in touch, then do it. If not, it's very easy to let go.
I suppose it is a little sad to know that within two months, these people that i have grown very close with will be on their separate ways. But thus is life, we move on and keep going.
I have plans, they change all the time, but at least i have a plan.

Eagle in the dark
Feathers in the pages
Monkeys in my heart
Rattling their cages
Found a way to pooooop
Another ghost to follow
Said its only up to you
It’s the hardest pill to swallow

You never get to choose
You live on what they send you
You know the kind of use
Things you love will get you
One foot in the grave
One foot in the shower
There’s never time to save
You’re paying by the hour

And that’s just the way it goes
Falling awake
And that’s just the way it goes

Slipping through the bars
Aware of the danger
Of riding in the cars
Taking candy from strangers
You’re never out of hand
Never out of pocket
Super sonic man
Do you want to buy a rocket

Well that’s just the way it goes
Falling awake
Falling awake
And that’s just the way it goes
Falling awake
Falling awake

Eagle in the dark
Feathers in the pages
Monkeys in my heart
Are rattling their cages
I could learn to play the game
Learn to run the hustle
If I only had the brains
The money or the muscle

- Gary Jules, Falling Awake

---

Cristina: There's a club. The "Dead Dads" club. And you can't be in it until you're in it. You can try to understand, you can sympathize.. but until you feel that loss- My dad died when I was nine. George, I'm really sorry you had to join the club.

George: I. [pause] I don't know how to exist in a world where my dad doesn't.

Cristina: Yeah, that never really changes.

This is for tee. I'm so sorry you had to join this club.

Even though this was one of the hardest grey's episodes to watch, I had to watch it again. I cannot concentrate on school, on anything really. I'm so distracted.

I'm not a part of this club, yet I'm constantly aware of how quickly a person you love can be taken away at a moment's notice. I'm not a part of this club, but I am part of another. It is almost six months later. The pain doesn't stop. It may dull, but the pain doesn't go away. On the outside I may look strong. Perhaps I forget for a moment, but there are always little subtle signs that remind me again. I don't mind, I like to remember the good times.

But the pain always remains.

i just realized that it has been quite some time since my last post. It's crazy how fast time flies sometimes.

classes at seneca started two weeks ago. the first week was filled with alot of awkward and tense filled moments because we were choosing our new groups. the problem lay in the fact that since first term, everyone now has a clear idea of who they want to work with...but most of all, who they do NOT want to work with. this created a lot of tension because no one wanted to work with certain people. but how do you avoid this without creating any drama? or even worse, what do you do when you ARE stuck in a group with so called classmate?

i have to say that i'm pretty happy with my loot. haha. to top it off, our class has received three new belgium girls!!! at the risk of sounding like a complainer, i was hoping for some belgium GUYS. seriously, the last thing we needed was more chicks. hahaha.

also, last weekend i went to get a haircut. let me take this opportunity to explain how stressful getting a haircut can be. i have always had very long hair. when i was little, i was a ballerina. and ballerina's always had long hair which they wound into buns on the top of the heads. when i stopped taking ballet lessons, i went and chopped half my hair, up to the middle of my back. ever since then, the shortest haircut i have had was up to my shoulders. the ordeal i went through with THAT particular haircut involved a razer blade with a chinese hairdresser. now, i avoid chinese hair salons like the plague.

the last couple times i have gone to evoke hairsalon. they are amazing. but both those times, my father would ask me "you went to get a haircut so that your hair looks exactly the same?"

so this time i started asking around for recommendations. and this time, i have received one of the best cuts ever. i now have side bangs that ACTUALLY compliment my face. i feel like i have had them forever! i must admit that it feels weird to have short hair again, but at least this time i can put it in a pony tail and not have it look like a rat-tail!

i also went to the symphony twice this week for mozart's 251st birthday. i went with mich on wednesday and we shared a two for one meal at marcel's, a lovely french restaurant. then yesterday i went with kristen...a bbtea meal before, and then through jake's recommendation, jeremiah bullfrog's afterwards. good times!

the bulk of my time is focusing on school, work, family and occasionally...friends. haha. that's a big lie. friends are so important to me too. it's what makes the world go round...

what a small small world...

it never fails to surprise me how many people i know who know one another. just today, i found out that my co-worker, carissa, knows a lot of my smc friends. we called up manny and he was soooo surprised!

and this is all thanks to facebook. if it wasn't for this phenomenal tool, i would never have known! this website has connected me with so many people that i have not spoken to in years!

i have found friends from highschool, from middle school, ELEMENTARY school (oh soloman!)...and EVEN old math tutorial classes!!! (how embarrassing!)

it's nice to find out what everyone is doing, even though it is a little creepy with the whole big brother-esque "news feed." hahaha.

c'est la vie!